Weekly Entry for 9/23

This week started off going really well with continued research on Medieval Jewelry and Torture devices/acts, but then took a turn towards the end of the week into a bit of confusion and realization that the direction I was heading wasn't exactly where I want to be going... at least not right now, not at this point in time.

From Friday to Friday:
Over the weekend I went to the Fine Arts Library and picked up three books on Medieval Jewelry and one book on Medieval Torture.

Tuesday I spent the first part of studio reading the jewelry books and taking notes (2.5 + hours). I found that much of the jewelry worn was exactly what I was imaging to work with for my pieces, especially the ones that symbolized love... or "Courtly Love" I should say, which is something I ironically had a already had a chance to previously study in a History class I took last year. The most popularly worn/gift-given pieces were brooches, either circular, heart shaped, or 4 or 6 pointed polygons. They were usually inscribed with some sort of love scripture, the most popular "Amor vincit omnia" ('Love conquers all'). Other popular gifts of love pieces worn by women were the ring, girdle (belt-like cloth), and a garland on the head. I discussed my findings with Erica for about 15 minutes afterward.

In Section we saw Janie's process, which I loved. It sparked something in me, some yearn to return to nature, and made me feel as if something was missing in my current direction. However, this feeling was not quite strong enough to steer me away from my current findings. For the rest of section I spent time reading the book on Medieval torture and taking more notes (1 hour).

Wednesday night I continued doing some online research on torture (2 hours) and was able to find how/why torture was applicable during that time period. I was also able to sort out which devices/acts were of interest to my studies for these pieces and more specifically, which were for women and/or adultery.

While I was making a ton of progress on all this research, that itchy feeling of something missing that I talked about, really started to set in. Wednesday night after my research I was reading for my Environment Justice class and realized just how passionate I am about the environment. I have always been extremely interested in environmental writings, literature, art, and activism, and have always found a way to portray that through much of my art (especially my metals work).

Therefore, Thursday morning, while spending the first 2 hours trying to stay focused on my Medieval research and sketch out ideas for my pieces.... it all came crashing down. I resulted in tears (mostly because a family indecent that occurred last week finally was hitting me and I was becoming very homesick). Through this release I realized that I truly need to bring nature back into my focus. It is something that is meditative for me to think about, create with, and symbolizes much of my growing up home life. After speaking again with Erica, I came to the conclusion, the direction I was going in was definitely one I liked, one that I feel great work could come from, however, it is not my current passion. The situation the project ideas spawned from no longer effects my life so I can no longer involve whole self in it. It would give me something to create, but not give me anything to learn/experience/discover in the process.

From this point, I spent the next part of the day, Section time (1.5 hours) writing about my nature environment at home, doing some sketching, and thinking about my family. I began to look into ways to create pieces that mimic nature that could at the same time tie into the women of my family (mainly my mother, grandmother, sister and I). I looked at flowers that represent our birth months. I also looked at different Michigan nuts. One of my favorite pieces that I've made so far is this walnut shaped locket that holds a jingle bell inside. I thought about the idea of continuing with this locket theme for the women, creating the outer shell out of metal, and placing the actual inner part of the nut on the inside. Even mixing the nuts up... where each women has a specific outer shell and her daughter holds the real inner nut of her shell inside her own outer shell. For example, My grandmother would have a walnut locket, my mother would have a chestnut locket, but hold the inner walnut inside. Thus, my sister and I would have a different outer-shell nut, with the actually chestnut held inside from our mother. These are just some ideas... but I like the idea of having something open and close with a surprise on the inside, and I like the idea of connection through the pieces.



So where to go from here:
So now that I have realized what I don't want to do... I am on to figuring out what I do want to do, or parts of it. This weekend I plan to take a trip back home to spend sometime with my family and go down to the Paint Creek River Trail (a trail that runs along the Clinton River). I grew up on this trial and have many many memories. It has shaped much of my passion for the environment as I have watched it change over the years and it in return has watched me grow myself.

I will do some writing, take many pictures, do some sketches, maybe paint, collect things, and let my wind wander and take in all that I am experiencing.

I can't wait.